Newness

I have a new room mate. New to this room, new to this life here. New to the people who live here. And scared, but the friendliness is contagious. We tend to find and long for love and we are lucky to find it in the most unusual of ways. In consoling a friend tonight, I fell in depression, I do hope I must have saved her but I know she might shed a tear in her sleep, I don't want to do the same. I am pretty strong, I've been trying to be. The only way I'd get strong is when this course gets over. The only thing I remember is the unabashed kindness of my parents as they ask about my health from miles away. Yes I miss them. In intervals. Mostly, I get used to the life here. In its little idiosyncrasies. I try to get lost in the daily chaos. I try so hard. Maybe I should stop trying so hard. Maybe I should learn to swim again. Gracefully move in the troubled waters. I was born there. It feels great to be alive, to have felt those amazing moments. Sometimes, I really wonder what we want in our life, is it really what we need?